• About
  • Who’s Who
  • Contributors

The Write Side of 59

~ This is What Happens When You Begin to Age Out of Middle Age

The Write Side of 59

Tag Archives: Julie Seyler

Beauty and the Beasts of its Burden

07 Thursday Mar 2013

Posted by WS50 in Confessional

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

Beauty, confessional, Julie Seyler, The Ugliest Woman in the World, The Write Side of 50

Is she beautiful?  Oil on canvas.  Julie Seyler

Is she beautiful?
Oil on canvas. Julie Seyler

BY JULIE SEYLER

I recently read an article in The Times about the ugliest woman in the world. According to the article, she was born with two genetic conditions: hypertrichosis lanuginosa and gingival hyperplasia, and as a result she was covered with hair and had super thick gums. This guy used her as a freak act in a traveling road show, and to secure her loyalty, and thereby a guaranteed income flow, he married her. They had a child together, but sadly it died at birth and she died five days later. The drawing of her confirms she was outside our concept of “beautiful.”

Then I remembered that classic 1960 Twilight Zone episode, where we watch the surgeon unwrap the bandages from a facial surgery.  The nurses chatter, discussing how many operations the patient has already had to try to correct her deformity of being ugly.  She can’t have any more. If this surgery failed, she will be deported to an island with others who look like her. The last bandage comes off; a unified gasp arises.  We know it has failed. Pan to the doctors and nurses with their pig snort noses and elephant ears. Pan to the patient – a “beautiful” blonde.

So what is beauty? And definitely what is “beautiful,” as we age, and live in a society that disdains the signs of age. What do we do when our peers look younger than us because of Botox, collagen fillers, chemical peels, eyelifts and the ultimate alteration: the face lift?  Do we succumb?  Do we decide it’s worth the bucks to have a face stripped of wrinkles? At 40, I proclaimed, with superior conviction, “I shall never get a face lift.  My wrinkles are a testament to the life i have lived.”  But each new contour tests my “wrinkle pride.” I am certainly old enough now to know to never say, “never!”

Share this:

  • Share on X (Opens in new window) X
  • Share on Facebook (Opens in new window) Facebook
  • Share on Reddit (Opens in new window) Reddit
  • Email a link to a friend (Opens in new window) Email
Like Loading...

The Riddle of the Sphinx Gives a Leg Up on Aging

28 Thursday Feb 2013

Posted by WS50 in Concepts

≈ 4 Comments

Tags

aging, Concepts, Julie Seyler, The Sphinx, The Write Side of 50

The Alabaster Sphinx.  Sculpted over 2500 years ago.  Memphis, Egypt.

The Alabaster Sphinx. Sculpted over 3000 years ago. Memphis, Egypt.

BY JULIE SEYLER

The Sphinx exists in the mythology of the ancient world, be it Egypt (1200 BC) or Greece (600 BC).  It is a hybrid creature with a human head, a lion’s body and wings for arms.  It is the catalyst that ignites the Oedipus saga chronicled by Homer, and dramatized by Sophocles.  Remember “The Odyssey” from sophomore year in high school: Oedipus answers the riddle, “What goes on four legs in the morning, on two legs at noon, and on three legs in the evening?”

Aging is a sphinx. It is mythologized. Our conversation is jammed with dramatic tales about what our bodies are doing these days – the duller and longer aches, the higher cholesterol count, and, my favorite of all – big toe arthritis.  Perhaps we know others who are suffering with more dire conditions. All of this weighs on us, because it used to be something that “happens to others.”

And yet it is a hybrid. There is good stuff going on. Wisdom, contentment; and self-awareness are hardly negatives and seemed unattainable to me when I was in my thirties. And since I am devotee of Facebook, there are tons of my peers getting the biggest kick and joy out of their grandkids. I love the photos. But none of this undermines the inevitable fact that we are moving on to the stage of three legs. So obviously, it’s time to throw caution to the wind, and head out for a cocktail and a schmooze-session with a great friend.

Share this:

  • Share on X (Opens in new window) X
  • Share on Facebook (Opens in new window) Facebook
  • Share on Reddit (Opens in new window) Reddit
  • Email a link to a friend (Opens in new window) Email
Like Loading...

Like That Old Fireplug I Found, I’m on Automatic

26 Tuesday Feb 2013

Posted by WS50 in Confessional

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

confessional, fireplugs, Julie Seyler, morning routine, The Write Side of 50

automatic fireplug.  west 20th street.

Automatic fireplug – West 20th Street.

BY JULIE SEYLER

There are certain things that stay the same, no matter which side of 50 you are on. Like a morning routine. The a.m. personality, and its peccadillos, gets fixed in stone at some point, and either you are a bright popper-outer or a groaning bear. Coffee must be imbibed ASAP, or it can wait until you get around to putting the water on the stove; or coffee is completely dispensed with because you only drink tea.

One of my morning routines is to swim. In 1980, I moved to Washington D.C., and promptly found a pool to do my morning laps in. When I moved to New York in 1988, I found a pool to swim in before I found my apartment, (which, for perspective sake, turned out to be a 4th floor walk-up studio with a sleeping alcove for $900/month. Cheap by today’s standards.) These days I swim at a pool which overlooks the Hudson River and Hoboken, NJ.

24 East 21st St.

24 East 21st St.

Sometimes I take the bus cross-town, and sometimes I walk.  If I walk, I travel the same three streets, cross the same 10 avenues, and have seen the same set of buildings for the past 16 years. Some are old, not old like Europe, but 19th century old. Some attempt to evoke a Greek-Roman essence.

Face on a building on West 21st Street

Face on a building on west 21st street

Faces are carved into the limestone facades; appear on portals above doors; adorn lintels.

Door portal on Gramercy Park East

Door portal on Gramercy Park East

Perhaps faces were the architectural rage of that moment the way glass buildings are the cultural rage of this moment.

Recently, I was doing my trek crosstown when something caught my eye. It was a white plaque nailed onto a wall of an apartment building on 20th street that read AUTOMATIC FIREPLUG, with the words A.F. A and E Co. written underneath.  I’d seen the sign a 1000 times, but this time I stopped to ponder what is an automatic fireplug and who was A.F. A and E Co. on 294 B’way.

The Internet was useless on A.F. A and E Co., but quite informative on fireplugs.  They plugged water.  In the 1800s, the best way to access water in case of a fire was to cut a hole in the main water pipe and insert a hose to direct the water to where needed to trounce the fire. The hole would then be plugged until next time it was needed. Ergo the fireplug. I just wonder when that sign was installed and when was the last time the fireplug was used?

I took the photo (at the top of the post) and kept on walking so I could complete the a.m. routine:

Get to pool; swim laps; shower; get ready for work; walk to bus stop; get back across town from the west side to east side; take
subway uptown; order iced green tea to go from Starbuck’s; turn on computer…

Share this:

  • Share on X (Opens in new window) X
  • Share on Facebook (Opens in new window) Facebook
  • Share on Reddit (Opens in new window) Reddit
  • Email a link to a friend (Opens in new window) Email
Like Loading...

Some Tips (Bring Your Coins!) on New York Restaurant Week

22 Friday Feb 2013

Posted by WS50 in Food

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

Food, Julie Seyler, Restaurant Week, The Write Side of 50

Is there enough there for dinner?

Take your coins out to dinner.

BY JULIE SEYLER

There is a phenomenon that takes place twice a year in New York City.  It’s called Restaurant Week, and many restaurants, including some top Zagat picks participate, which means that it is possible to nab delicious three-course lunches for $28, and dinners for $38, when normally it could run double the price for the identical meal. So the possibility exists to grab a bang-for-buck experience if you order wisely.

As soon as Restaurant Week restaurants are announced, I scan the list for special treat places that are not on my usual roster. This year, I made a reservation at Rouge Tomate, a 2012 Michelin choice on 60th Street, DBGB Bistro Moderne, a gem in the stable of the the Daniel Boulud empire on 44th Street, and Telepan, an Upper West Side place that I had heard had a cuisine kinship to Gramercy Tavern, but at lesser price points.

Each experience was different and memorable, but not because the meal ended in a deal. That was thrown out the window with the check.

At Rouge Tomate, where I had invited my mother and my sister to dinner, I found out, after we had ordered the wine, that they did participate, but only for lunch. I had forgotten to read the “fine” print and we were handed the regular menu, where some of the entrees are priced at $38.

I went with a friend to DBGB Bistro Moderne for lunch. Everything was perfect, from the appetizer of a winter salad to the braised beef paleron (actually a very tender wine infused brisket), to the cheese plate offerings for dessert. Of course I had to have a glass of wine, and of course, the cost of the wine was basically equal to half the cost of the prix fixe meal. With tax and tip, my prix fixe lunch came in at double the bargain. It was delicious and lovely and a treat because certainly, a three-course feast at lunch on a Wednesday afternoon is an excessive indulgence.

Then there was Telepan.

Everyone has said, “You must go.” I asked a friend of mine if he was available. He told me he was in the middle of a budgetary balancing act. But I am persistent, and repeatedly mentioned $38! For a three-course meal! At a great restaurant! I (and a menu featuring smoked brook trout, shrimp with grits and a medley of heritage pork cuts), wore him down. With a little creative financial juggling, including a raid on his coin stash, hoarded in a plastic food container, we had a yummy dinner at Telepan. But not for the amount we calculated based on the Restaurant Week special.

Rather, the bill was three times the amount of the $38 dinner per person.

Telepan pairings 2.7.13

Telepan pairings 2.7.13

 

Willpower went out the door when we saw the wine pairing option. Who could resist? Each selection a perfect foil for the food, and even though we’d eaten three courses and were stuffed, we felt compelled to order dessert. So, throw in tax and tip, and there you have the killing of the bang-for-buck theory.

In any case, I would definitely return to this place. The impeccability of the way the food was prepared and presented, combined with the feeling that you are dining in a friend’s home conspire to make a wonderful experience. But you can have it all, and probably cheaper, if you decide to stay away during Restaurant Week.

Share this:

  • Share on X (Opens in new window) X
  • Share on Facebook (Opens in new window) Facebook
  • Share on Reddit (Opens in new window) Reddit
  • Email a link to a friend (Opens in new window) Email
Like Loading...

The Saturday Blog: Reflecting

16 Saturday Feb 2013

Posted by Lois DeSocio in Art

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

Art, Julie Seyler, Madrid, The Write Side of 50

Prismatic light. Madrid, Spain.

Prismatic light. Madrid, Spain.

This photo reminds us of our four-day jaunt to Madrid, Spain in December 2011. It was taken inside one of the many cathedrals throughout the city that we would wander in to. Here, Julie caught and snapped the prismatic light that streamed through the stained glass windows to create patterns of abstract art.

Share this:

  • Share on X (Opens in new window) X
  • Share on Facebook (Opens in new window) Facebook
  • Share on Reddit (Opens in new window) Reddit
  • Email a link to a friend (Opens in new window) Email
Like Loading...

Happy Valentine’s Day

14 Thursday Feb 2013

Posted by Lois DeSocio in Art

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

Art, Julie Seyler, The Write Side of 50, Valentines Day

Card designed by Julie Seyler ...

so gorged on love for you copy i burst for us

Share this:

  • Share on X (Opens in new window) X
  • Share on Facebook (Opens in new window) Facebook
  • Share on Reddit (Opens in new window) Reddit
  • Email a link to a friend (Opens in new window) Email
Like Loading...

Could the Gun Debate Come Down to a Comma?

13 Wednesday Feb 2013

Posted by WS50 in Confessional

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

confessional, Julie Seyler, second amendment, The Write Side of 50

well regulated

BY JULIE SEYLER

When did guns take over our lives? As I was growing up, I do not recall that guns ever entered the daily parlance. We were obsessed with voting rights for 18 year olds (if they could be drafted they should have a right to vote), Haight Ashbury and the drug scene, the loosening of the Hays Code, and Vietnam. I do not remember a community mass-shooting, or a non-stop public outcry that there was not just a “right,” but a “Constitutional right” to own a gun. In fact, to the extent that any discussion about guns arose, it was within the context that they inevitably led to unnecessary tragedy because gun-related murders (at least most of them) were crimes of passion, rage, and anger, and had the gun not been so accessible, a life would have been saved.

Now the scene has shifted so much that the topic of guns as killing devices competes with the topic of guns as a consumer product for the masses. In the past three weeks, The New York Times has run articles on the AR-15 semi-automatic rifle, supposedly the most desired gun in America; how more women then ever are embracing gun ownership; and marketing guns to our children’s children, and this is mere icing on the cake. The question is: How, why and when did the national psyche change from a general consensus that guns were “bad,” to this new world that does not seem to even blink at marketing guns as fashion accessories. The Times article on the escalating number of women purchasers reported that pink guns are a favorite. Like the color of Pepto-Bismol. This whole idea makes me nauseous.

pink handgun in orange handbag

Pink handgun in orange handbag

Certainly Columbine, in 1999, was a major catalyst. And pile on all of the other mass shootings over the past 14 years, and you arrive at an understanding of why guns take up front, and center, stage. But I think the underlying shape-shifting phenomenon that brought the “right” to own a gun to the forefront has been the twisting of the Second Amendment. In its entirety the amendment reads:

A well regulated militia, being necessary to the security of a free state, the right of the people to keep and bear arms, shall not be infringed.

My theory is that some strategist in some gun-loving coalition latched on to the 14-word phrase, “the right of the people to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed,” to push a platform of deregulating any type of government control over gun ownership and sales. In so doing, the meaning of the amendment was distorted beyond recognition. The comma that follows the word “arms” was conveniently dispensed with and the preface about the “well regulated militia” was disposed of as an unnecessary nuisance.

There is a glaring problem in this interpretation, and I know I am flying in the face of the Supreme Court’s decision in District of Columbia v. Heller. However, one cannot divorce a phrase such as the right to bear arms from the entirety of the sentence, nor can one ignore the preamble which explains that, “a well regulated Militia” is “necessary” to ensure that we the people remain safe and secure in a “free State.” The Second Amendment sanctions a military that has a right to bear arms, not the individual’s right to bear arms.

This makes so much sense when we think about the world the founding fathers were living in when the Constitution was adopted in 1787. The colonies, as subjects of England, had fought in a bunch of wars even before the eight year battle to secure their independence from England. The militia had been indispensable to the colonies’ successful separation from King George III and his irksome taxes. They had just won a revolution so it was completely logical that the men who drafted the Constitution would have wanted to ensure that “a well-regulated militia” would be allowed to “bear arms.” They had first-hand knowledge that it was “necessary” to the security of the “free State” they had just formed and wanted to maintain. Ergo the Constitution granted the people a right to bear arms for this purpose. It wasn’t an inalienable right, like those accorded by the First Amendment:

“Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the government for a redress of grievances.”

Had the founding fathers believed that the right to bear arms was unfettered, they would have added it to the First Amendment, a simple addition, such as “Congress shall make no law restricting the right to bear arms.” But they didn’t. They drafted an entirely different Second Amendment prefaced with the phrase: “A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State.”

So I consider the debate over the Second Amendment as the turning point and tipping point of the shift. The reinvention of the amendment has fueled the NRA. It has the Constitution on its side to relentessly and shamelessly push for unregulated gun sales and the liberty to carry a handgun into a movie theatre. It seems to me their Constitutionally sanctioned efforts are successfully ripping apart the security of our free state.

Share this:

  • Share on X (Opens in new window) X
  • Share on Facebook (Opens in new window) Facebook
  • Share on Reddit (Opens in new window) Reddit
  • Email a link to a friend (Opens in new window) Email
Like Loading...

Born to Ride: Is My Love for the Two-Seater Convertible Genetically Driven?

11 Monday Feb 2013

Posted by WS50 in Concepts

≈ 4 Comments

Tags

Cars., Concepts, Genetics, Julie Seyler, The Write Side of 50, Two-seater convertibles

In Dad's MG, circa 1960.

In Dad’s MG, circa 1960.

BY JULIE SEYLER

Cars have been on my mind lately. It started because I saw an article in the Sunday Times a couple of weeks ago about a car auction. But it wasn’t any old car auction. This one featured autos with provenance – like a purple 1919 Pierce-Arrow, owned by the silent film star, Fatty Arbuckle, and a 1941 Packard, owned by the ice-skating actress, Sonja Henie. These cars were gorgeous.

Then I was talking to a friend of mine, who was in the middle of multiple car transactions, like selling two cars (including a beloved sports car), and simultaneously buying a new, used, practical car. He was doing everything over eBay. It was natural for our conversation to segue from cars we “loved” to cars we “hated.”  We ended the conversation with the conclusion that everybody has an opinion about cars, even if their opinion is, “no opinion.”

It’s true. I know people who only want to be behind the wheel of an automobile that makes them “feel like they are driving a living room couch,” and others who are passionate about their hybrids (especially the gas-to-mile ratio), and some who just love the majestic height afforded by an SUV. Me? I have always cottoned to small cars with convertible tops.

After all these car musings, I started pondering whether one’s car preferences has anything to do with one’s past? Most people would probably say their car decisions are purely arbitrary, or simply pragmatic, but I am sure there is a Proustian component to my predilection for two-seater convertibles.

Fifty years ago, when I was a kid (just saying that phrase, “50 years ago,” cracks me up – can those words actually be coming from my mouth as an accurate statement of fact), I did pop about in an MGTD. My father, a true-blue sports car devotee, would squeeze me and my sister, and our two Chatty Cathy dolls, into the trundle seat of his MG, and off we’d go up the Garden State Parkway, through the Holland Tunnel and over the Brooklyn Bridge to visit my grandparents. The top would be down, of course, and the wind would fly through our hair. I can’t imagine anyone with a four year old and a six year old contemplating a journey like that today. We live in a world where car seat safety dominates.

In any case, perhaps it is because of those early road trip memories that I love two-seater convertibles. The wind in my hair never gets old. So, while I was reminiscing about the “old” days, I asked my dad what other cars he owned. He replied:

We had a few MGTDs 1950s; also MGA 1960; also MGB 1962; Corvettes – three of them, 1964s. When you were a baby in Fort Lee, we had a ’52 Morris Minor. Grandma made a convertible top for it. I forgot to mention our 55 T-Bird convertible with the hard top.

They were all small, two-seater, convertibles, except maybe the Morris Minor. Not sure if he, too, loves the wind in his hair, but the car genes were passed down.

Share this:

  • Share on X (Opens in new window) X
  • Share on Facebook (Opens in new window) Facebook
  • Share on Reddit (Opens in new window) Reddit
  • Email a link to a friend (Opens in new window) Email
Like Loading...

A Sketchy View of the Aging Body

08 Friday Feb 2013

Posted by WS50 in Art, Opinion

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

aging, Art, Julie Seyler, opinion, The Write Side of 50

Drawing by Julie Seyler

BY JULIE SEYLER

So many mysteries seem to descend on the right side of 50 body. You know, that icky age spot that pops up on the left hand; the appearance of a clump, not a strand, of gray hairs, dead center on your head. And those bags of flesh hanging just below the armpits. Lovely! We think this drawing basically sums it up.

Share this:

  • Share on X (Opens in new window) X
  • Share on Facebook (Opens in new window) Facebook
  • Share on Reddit (Opens in new window) Reddit
  • Email a link to a friend (Opens in new window) Email
Like Loading...

When Petty Meets Pretty

06 Wednesday Feb 2013

Posted by WS50 in Art, Confessional

≈ 5 Comments

Tags

aging, Art, confessional, Julie Seyler, The Write Side of 50

"the fascination of beauty" Collage by Julie Seyler

“The fascination of beauty.” Collage by Julie Seyler

BY JULIE SEYLER

I live in Manhattan, and am surrounded by gorgeous women of all ages. But my eye gravitates towards those younger than me, who can still traverse the city streets in 7″ heels, completely oblivious to foot pain. Their wrinkle-free skin holds the dewy blush of infinite confidence. The world truly is their oyster, or at least that is what I choose to project onto them as they stride down the street, smartphone in hand, laughing jauntingly on their way to Thursday night happy hour.

I was her once. But alas, no more. At a time long prior to now, could I ever really imagine that one day I would be 57? Approaching 60? It was much too far away, and in my mind, it was not going to happen. I would stay stuck in whatever year I happened to be immersed in at the moment.

I am ashamed to admit it, but there are times when envy for “their” current youth smacks right up against wistfulness for “my” long lost youth. At those precarious moments, I take gleeful pleasure in singing to myself a la Audrey Hepburn in “My Fair Lady,” “Just you wait ‘enry ‘iggins, just you wait.”

That small, petty part of me just needs to secretly and quietly cackle:

“Ha, ha, ha. One day, you flawless flexible soul of youth, will be here – on the right side of 50. And you’ll also wonder where it all went, and how did it go so fast?”

Share this:

  • Share on X (Opens in new window) X
  • Share on Facebook (Opens in new window) Facebook
  • Share on Reddit (Opens in new window) Reddit
  • Email a link to a friend (Opens in new window) Email
Like Loading...
← Older posts
Newer posts →

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Join 293 other subscribers

Twitter Updates

Tweets by WriteSideof50

Recent Posts

  • The Saturday Blog: Rooftops India
  • The Saturday Blog: The Heavy Duty Door
  • Marisa Merz at the Met Breuer
  • The Sunday Blog: Center Stage
  • The Saturday Blog: Courtyard, Pondicherry, India.

Archives

  • April 2017
  • March 2017
  • January 2017
  • December 2016
  • November 2016
  • October 2016
  • September 2016
  • August 2016
  • July 2016
  • June 2016
  • May 2016
  • April 2016
  • March 2016
  • February 2016
  • January 2016
  • December 2015
  • November 2015
  • October 2015
  • September 2015
  • August 2015
  • July 2015
  • June 2015
  • February 2015
  • January 2015
  • December 2014
  • November 2014
  • October 2014
  • September 2014
  • August 2014
  • July 2014
  • June 2014
  • May 2014
  • April 2014
  • March 2014
  • February 2014
  • January 2014
  • December 2013
  • November 2013
  • October 2013
  • September 2013
  • August 2013
  • July 2013
  • June 2013
  • May 2013
  • April 2013
  • March 2013
  • February 2013
  • January 2013
  • December 2012
  • November 2012

Categories

  • Art
  • Concepts
  • Confessional
  • Earrings; Sale
  • Entertainment
  • Film Noir
  • Food
  • Memoriam
  • Men
  • Movies
  • News
  • Opinion
  • Photography
  • politics
  • September 11
  • Travel
  • Words

Meta

  • Create account
  • Log in
  • Entries feed
  • Comments feed
  • WordPress.com

The Write Side of 50

The Write Side of 50

Enter your email address to follow this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Join 293 other subscribers

Blog at WordPress.com.

  • Subscribe Subscribed
    • The Write Side of 59
    • Join 293 other subscribers
    • Already have a WordPress.com account? Log in now.
    • The Write Side of 59
    • Subscribe Subscribed
    • Sign up
    • Log in
    • Report this content
    • View site in Reader
    • Manage subscriptions
    • Collapse this bar
 

Loading Comments...
 

    %d