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The Write Side of 59

Tag Archives: Julie Seyler

You Can Dress Me Up Like a Lobster Timbale (or a Sea Urchin on Pedigreed Pea) …

09 Wednesday Oct 2013

Posted by WS50 in Food

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

Food, Julie Seyler, Le Bernadin, The Write Side of 50

Lobster timbale at Le Bernadin

Lobster timbale at Le Bernardin.

BY JULIE SEYLER

… but you should not take someone like me, whose favorite food is sourdough pretzels with aged cheddar cheese, to haute cuisine restaurants. The appreciation factor for sea urchin on a pedigreed pea with lemon zest is not going to fly high. Nonetheless, for years I have tried to be more of a gourmand rather than someone who is a repetitive orderer of spaghetti with tomatoes and basil. I am, by my own admission, boring to dine with. Plus I think people with refined palettes are more sensual than the plebe that goes for sirloin. On the other hand, one could make a good argument that nothing is sexier than a rare steak.

Steak, albeit not rare enough for some

Steak, albeit not rare enough for some.

Anyway, this summer I had a chance to dine at Le Bernardin, one of the premier restaurants in Manhattan – or so say the pundits of the food world: Le Bernardin. To a great degree, the dishes live up to their reputation (charred octopus, Alaskan King Crab “Crabouillabaisse,” and lobster timbale appetizers), but to me, a reveler of simple grilled fish, I was slightly underwhelmed by my Dover Sole, where the restaurant tagged on an $18 supplement to the $130 prix fixe. It arrived seared and tough – as in dried out – although the “Brown-Butter Tamarind Vinaigrette,” as it was described, sang rapturously. Nonetheless, the balance of the experience left me more convinced than ever that the best restaurants are not on any media lists.

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Happy Birthday (to Me!) from Indonesia

01 Tuesday Oct 2013

Posted by WS50 in Travel

≈ 3 Comments

Tags

Bali, Birthday, Java, Julie Seyler, The Write Side of 50, Travel, Yogyakarta

Celebration. October, 2012

No matter where I am, I clink on my birthday (October 2012 in New York).

BY JULIE SEYLER

I turned 58 today in Yogyakarta, Java. According to my trip itinerary we shall be flying at 7:55 a.m. back to Bali, where we travel to Pemuteran in the far north of the island for a couple of days of snorkeling. We may see a waterfall, and a temple or two, along the way, and hopefully will stop at a market to go souvenir shopping – one of my favorite things to do. I am a complete tourist, and adore shopping for tchotchkes that I would not see back at home. (Although these days we live in such a global world, everything seems to be available online.)

So my birthday is a travel day, and that’s fine. I will be doing something that I don’t usually do on my birthday – like driving in Indonesia. And will definitely do something I always do – celebrate.

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Farewell, Julie! Keep Your Nose Down

26 Thursday Sep 2013

Posted by Lois DeSocio in Travel

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

Bali, Julie Seyler, scents, The Write Side of 50, Travel

P1180339

Yesterday, Julie and Steve took to the skies towards Bali for a few weeks vacation time. True to fashion, Julie’s head did not pause in its pondering – specifically, this time, about what can potentially go up her nose.

I know you’ll all join me in wishing her and Steve safe travels, fun, and adventure. I’ll reach into the vault for some Julie-posts while she’s away.

Below is her last live entry before hitting, no doubt, a potentially pungent JFK airport:
~Lois

Steve and I are en route to Bali, somewhere between Hong Kong and Jakarta. Luckily, we dodged Typhoon Usagi and our flight was not canceled. So while I am on my way of the country, it seems like a good time to discuss a pet peeve, a personal peccadillo, a piddling pimple of an insignificant annoyance.

I have a preternatural distaste for things that have been aromatized to make them theoretically “smell” better. Floor polish that conjures up a piney forest, detergents that are supposed to remind me of the ocean, and a city bus infused with a rose-scented room deodorizer wraps my nose in indignity. (And of course if the bus window is hermetically sealed so that I can’t even open it, I become outraged at the thought that I am a prisoner to a rose bomb!)

The greatest affront of all is being at a restaurant seated next to someone who has had the audacity to douse themselves in scent. I have waltzed in, anticipating a meal infused with roasted garlic and fresh herbs, and instead Brut is wafting up my nostrils. It is always a tad embarrassing for my dinner companion when I discreetly whisper to the waiter that we must change tables because I have a problem with the way the person sitting next to me smells.

I hope the plane I’m flying in isn’t a perfumed vehicle filled with perfumed people. It’s a pretty long flight.

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We Partied Like It’s 1973

23 Monday Sep 2013

Posted by Lois DeSocio in Confessional

≈ 5 Comments

Tags

Asbury Park, confessional, High School Reunion, Julie Seyler, Lois DeSocio, OTHS, The Write Side of 50

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It wouldn’t be us, without some Asbury. Photo by Mindy Kirchner Schwartz.

BY LOIS (ROTHFELD) DESOCIO and JULIE SEYLER

Good to know that middle age has not diminished the verve, and the spunk, that I see as still defining my high school graduating class. Forty years after getting our diplomas, our reunion this past weekend was like us – effusive, diversified, funky, and fun (with attention paid to booze and yummy food).

A one-night affair would not be enough for us. We want a spree. So the first hellos and hugs were exchanged at a night-before party at the Wonder Bar in Asbury. (A former stop on The Circuit – where many of us, and our first cars, drove in circles.)

We were more spruced-up the next day, but felt just at home with an afternoon-into-the-night fest on the grounds of our classmate’s on-the-Navesink River manse:P1180360

There were top-notch, elegant foodstuffs from fruit to nuts to chocolate:IMG_0166

And we ended the night true to our 18-year-old selves: scarfing down Windmill hot dogs:IMG_0171

Yes, we might be bending towards 60, but our feet didn’t fail us on the dance floor: IMG_0200

And we embraced our commonality. And our diversity: IMG_0160

A big-hearted thanks to everyone – the intrepid organizers, the magnanimous Manns, and the groovy, far-out, super-duper Spartans. (Who all “look exactly the same!”) Lois

******************

Memories...

Memory Board.

And so it came to pass. After a year, perhaps even longer, of planning, organizing, and strategizing, the reunion committee made it happen. About 110 of the 400-plus graduating class of 1973 gathered at a petite chateau on the banks of the Navesink River on an iffy weather Saturday.

For about two weeks before, one classmate had taken on the duty of providing daily weather updates, the final forecast being there was definitely a chance that rain was going to come down on the festivities. It didn’t matter – we walked into a playlist of reel to reel hits from the 1970s, assiduously compiled by one guy who had asked each of us for a contribution of our favorite song. There were kisses, hugs, laughs and mutual choruses of “You look great!;” “What’s new?;” and (embarrassingly enough), “Who are you?”

We ate, drank and danced, but the absolute highlight was when we enmassed the dance floor to belt out American Pie screaming at the top of our lungs, “Drove the Chevy to the levee, but the levee was dry.” The band segued into “We Are Family”, and there we were in choreographic unison, shouting, “I got all my sisters with me.” I couldn’t help but think that in some way we really were all still “family.”

I hadn’t seen most of these people in 20, 30, 40 years, and yet there we were back in high school. There is a level of comfort, familiarity and togetherness that is unique, and I think somewhat special, but perhaps not unusual. After all, we did spend almost every day together for four years, and for some of us even before that, starting out in elementary school and moving on to Dow Avenue where we were tormented into memorizing the words to “The Impossible Dream” for 8th grade graduation.

Then it was over. The band channeled Donna Summer, and played one last dance, and the goodbyes started. Wishes of health and happiness and, “Let’s get together,” and “See you soon.” Then more hugs and kisses. And off we tramped in the rain.

So hats off, and mega kudos to the man with the digs who so graciously opened his home and the reunion committee of the Class of ’73, who threw a party that made it so much fun to go home again! Here’s to seeing everybody in 2023. xoxox, Julie.

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A Construct of Connections Help Gain Perspective

20 Friday Sep 2013

Posted by WS50 in Concepts

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

Concepts, Julie Seyler, karma, The Write Side of 50

Everything's connected. Mobile by Julie Seyler.

Everything’s connected. Mobile by Julie Seyler.

BY JULIE SEYLER

Does being generous in spirit lead to a better sex life?

Does being kind really beget kindness?

Is it true that if we give good karma to the universe, we will be showered with good karma back?

Do positive thoughts contribute to good health?

Does it matter if any of this is true, if the simple thought of it reduces stress to less?

Is it better to feel the pain as deep and hard as you can so you can thereafter embrace pure joy?

If you walk through a storm is there a rainbow at the end?

Can a good telepathic connection get you what you want when you need it most?

Who knows. But answering, “Yes!,” to all of those questions can’t hurt a thing.

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Thanks, Mom, For the Bite of the Travel Bug

16 Monday Sep 2013

Posted by WS50 in Travel

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

Julie Seyler, The Write Side of 50, Travel

frames 118

My mom (left), touring with her mom (right).

BY JULIE SEYLER

When I was a kid, my mother regaled me with her travel tales – how wearing a black shirt in Italy in 1950 almost landed her in jail; how she wore a custom-made taffeta slip into the Casino at Cannes (she didn’t have an appropriate dress with her), and subsequently met a man who took her on a motorcycle ride through Provence.

And how she went with her mother to Mexico because her father was busy working. I would pore through her photographs, and pepper her with questions about the places she’d been; the adventures she had.

frames 115

I promised myself that one day I would travel.

When I went to college, I was lucky to spend six months studying in London. The school planned weekend trips, so I had a chance to visit Cambridge and Bath; Brighton and Oxford. And spring break meant a Eurail pass, and train rides through France, Germany and Italy. It’s buried in storage, but I still have the notebook I bought in Florence where I recorded all my experiences – the musings of a 20 year old on the night train from Naples back to Calais.

When I got my first real job, I saved my money for a three-week trip to Greece. I went with a girlfriend from grade school. We landed in Athens, and took the ferries to Paros, Naxos, Santorini and Mykonos. I stood on the floor of the Parthenon. There was nobody there.

Me at the Parthenon. 1983

That’s me at the Parthenon in 1983.

When I returned in 2000, it was draped in barricade rope, and surrounded by tour buses from every country in the world. Or so it seemed. In 1983 the total cost for that three-week sojourn was $1500. And while everything was certainly cheaper, I was so young,that renting a room with a cot for $7 a night made complete sense.

Since that trip, I have picked a different place to visit every year – but one.

People have bucket lists of things, such as birds to see, or mountains to climb, and triathlons to compete in. But mine is about places I want to visit. Last year was a wash because of the hip (surgery, that is). Having to cancel a trip three weeks prior to departure because of bone-on-bone arthritis was truly a bummer. But reality trumped fantasy. My body would not behave through that pain. So I re-upped for 2013, and will be off to Kalimantan on the Indonesian side of Borneo to see the orangutans on September 25.

I do not know what it will be like. It sounds quite lovely, but I prefer going without any expectations. I want to walk off the plane and have those unknown smells, color and sights descend like a tidal wave.

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The End of “Never”

13 Friday Sep 2013

Posted by WS50 in Confessional

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

confessional, Julie Seyler, Never say never, The Write Side of 50

never say never

BY JULIE SEYLER

Since I crossed the river to reside on the right side of 50, I know never to say never. When I was “young,” there were so many things I would never do when I got “old.”

I was never ever going to be like my grandparents and old aunts and uncles that would spend endless hours dissecting their bodily ailments. These days, I find a sort of odd pleasure in regaling my friends with the nuances of big-toe arthritis and having them lobby back on knee issues.

I was never, ever, going to go to an early-bird dinner. These days. I definitely appreciate the quiet emptiness that envelops a restaurant before the mad rush that descends at the fashionable dining hour of 8:00 p.m. Not to mention the cash benefit of a discounted meal.

I was never, ever, going to be one of those couples that sat across from each other, silently focusing on the pleasure of food. My mate and I were going to be engaged in endless and fascinating animated conversation – dissecting the political and social dilemmas of the day. These days, there is only so much drama I can rehash at the end of the day. Silence can be so comfortable and comforting.

The advantage of youth is we know so much for sure, no one can tell us otherwise. The world is black, and it is white. But never gray. The brilliance of now is nuance. And the knowledge that saying “never,” never works.

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The Matrix That is September 11

11 Wednesday Sep 2013

Posted by Lois DeSocio in Confessional

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

2001, confessional, Julie Seyler, Lois DeSocio, September 11, The Write Side of 50, Twin Towers

9.12.01.

Photos courtesy of The New York Times, September 12, 2001.



Since the attacks of September 11, 2001, a collective consciousness surrounding the events has formed. No matter one’s political views, or how close in proximity one was to the World Trade Center, the Pentagon, or the field in Shanksville, Pennsylvania; no matter whether one chooses to ignore history, or immerse oneself in remembrances; or if loved ones were lost, or if there was no personal connection to the events at all – the date, no doubt, provokes personal recollections. Here are ours:

BY LOIS DESOCIO

I live 15 minutes from Newark Airport; 15 miles from Manhattan. I was speeding downhill in my car about two hours after the towers collapsed, to not only get to my sons at school to bring them home, but because I had a fight-or-flight, duck!, fear piercing me from my throat on down. I believed that at any moment, planes were going to start falling out of the sky on top of me – no matter where I went. It was then, and still is today, the most out of control I’ve ever felt. And the closest I’ve ever felt to death – not only my death, and the death of everyone I loved, but the death of our civilization; our world.

Every September 11 since then, I’m reminded of the ignorant complacency that comes with passing time. I mourn the loss of clarity that I felt that day, and in the weeks and months after. Clarity that only comes with a first encounter with something that has never happened before, and bears nothing else in comparison.

*******

BY JULIE SEYLER

Since 1997, I have walked east to west to go to my gym in the morning. Looking south from 6th Avenue and 20th Street, I had a perfect and direct view of the Twin Towers. I would debate with myself whether I liked them from an architectural standpoint. I would remember the controversy surrounding their erection. I could never decide. All I knew, for sure, was that they were big, and I had eaten a lovely wine-filled meal at Windows on the World.

On September 13, 2001, I walked east to west, and looked south from 6th and 20th.The sky was black – a plume of smoke and ashes. And the Twin Towers were gone. The emptiness in the sight-line can still catch me. Their nonexistence is an unending reminder of their existence. The Ground Zero Memorial and Freedom Tower fill the space but, for me, do not heal the wound of September 11, 2001.

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My Avant-Garde Sister, and Her Hip, Off-the-Shoulder Tattoo

09 Monday Sep 2013

Posted by WS50 in Art, Confessional

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

Art, confessional, Julie Seyler, tattoos, The Write Side of 50

Bodhi

Bodhi.

BY JULIE SEYLER

Way, way before tats became au courant, my sister had a gorgeous tattoo of a bodhisattva, that enlightened disciple of Buddha, etched onto her right shoulder. I remember the first time I saw it – around 1986 or 1987. I was shocked that she had had half of her arm covered by a tattoo. But there was no denying the artistry of the piece. It had been drawn by a brilliant artist who simply preferred skin to canvas, never a concept I quite embraced, but it was a work of fine art. The delicacy of the lines, and the sensitivity of the shading, merged into a face of compassion and tranquility. The posted photo does not do it justice, but after searching the thousands of photos of my sister I found out I never nailed a great shot of the tattoo. I was too resistant to the idea of scored skin (still am) to want to take a picture. But after 20 years, I became used to it. Even fond of it.

But things change, and the tattoo no longer fit my sister’s lifestyle, so she decided to have it removed. She told me it was a long and painful process. The one piece of advice she has given her daughters, should they decide to go the way of Bob’s son, and get a tattoo is: stay away from color.

It is purely practical advice because it is a bear to remove inked-in red, blue and green hues from the skin. And as we, who reside on the right side of 50 know all too well, skin texture morphs, melts and perhaps even sags in some places. We know that that tattooed cinnabar heart, which seemed so alluring on the arm at 20, may actually droop uncontrollably at 60.

Anyway, from time to time, I sort of miss the bodhi that danced on my sister’s shoulder. However, she has informed me, that if I look closely, traces of her remain – an outline of a memory.

So here’s to my sister, who had the hipness to decide to get a tattoo ahead of the curve. And is no doubt still ahead of the curve in getting it removed.

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Someone Left a Garden in My New Backyard (Help)

03 Tuesday Sep 2013

Posted by WS50 in Food

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

backyard garden, Food, Julie Seyler, lettuce, The Write Side of 50, tomatoes

The Moon 8.25.13

BY JULIE SEYLER

On Sunday, August 25, at around 6:30 a.m., the moon was still luminous. I went outside and surveyed the land in the backyard.

You see, I, through Steve, have inherited an estate – or shall we say Steve is now the proprietor of a three-story house with a deck, set upon a corner lot with a detached two-car garage. It is hardly perfect, but it is adorable. And until we walked inside with keys in hand, we had not a clue that the prior owner was an ardent and passionate gardener.

She left us ripening tomatoes and budding peppers, sprouting lettuce and a few cucumber shoots. And boundless flowers of every color, shape and form:

ripening tomatoes

peppers 231lettuce 231

purple flower

flower 231

I figure the whole garden gig is a gift. If one side of the “getting old” seesaw is dealing with illness and reading obituaries, the other side is knowing to BE HERE NOW. We are wise that this moment will be gone one day, and not easily recapturable. It is also a sign- I am supposed to develop a green thumb. After 38 years of apartment living sans a plant, it is time to start digging. I so love going to the Farmer’s Market, but now there is a mini-farm in our backyard. (Of course, the irony of it all will be that I won’t dig gardening at all.) In the meantime, Steve hooked up a sprinkler timed to go off every day at 11:00 so that the vegetables get water. What else do we do? Tips appreciated.

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